let me paint the scene. i get the gym at lunch and i see this white bentley with a handi-plate parked in front in a handi-space. i think "da hell is a bentley with a handi-plate doing at a gym" then i step inside. swipe the ol card and head to the ol elliptical as i do. whilst there my eyes fall upon this tall tan chick with curly hair down to the hips and a body sir-mix-a-lot could not lie about (if you know what i mean) i mean if i could cobble together the image of a perfect body from various famous people she had it.
enter this p-diddy wanna be wearing platinum chains versace shades (inside the gym while working out) and ridiculous roided up muscles. guess who the chick and the car belong to?
worst part of my vision of female perfection was the "ghetto talk" that came out of that chicks mouth. envision water on popcorn. white chicks that sound like gangsta rappers are a HUGE turn off. i don't like that gangsta rappers talk like that either. my ex used to do that shit when she "gotta round her peeps" and man how i would kringe.
moral of the story. i'd much rather be with EXACTLY like karen phillipini from the office (rashida jones) than any other.
even chicks with other worldly bodily dimensions. for the life of me i don't know how you can be so thin and toned yet have an ass that looks like you're smuggling christmas hams!!! but hey i appreciate the beautiful diversity God created.
-Christmas ham lovin' dominator